I was lucky enough to escape the well-intended deluge of marriage “advice” after I got engaged. That is most likely because I see approximately 15 people on a regular basis. But I had already heard the common answer to “How’s married life???” many times in my 23 years.
“Well… It’s good… But it’s HARD.”
“Oh you know, it’s an adjustment.”
“Be careful who you marry—you really do marry their entire family.”
These came from faces with knowing smirks or thinly veiled exasperation. I swore my marriage would be different!
But it’s not.
Let me tell you, it is hard to get out of the bed in the morning when the man of your dreams is still in it. It is hard to see someone you adore become discouraged and feel their discouragement like its your own. It is hard to feel like you’re not being as nice as you hoped you would be.
It is an adjustment to make important decisions with the person I trust the most, and no longer make them alone. It is an adjustment to get in arguments that will never end in a break up, but always end in hugs and kisses. It is an adjustment to see hair in the sink and smile, because this time it’s not hair from my head, but hair from an emptied razor belonging to the man I now live with.
And okay, the family thing is true. Nathanael’s family wooed me and I married him for them too. I wish everyone’s in-laws were as nice to their new daughter/sister/cousin as mine are to me!
My overall rating on marriage: 5 stars, two thumbs up. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, and you’ll be shown what you need to do to become more Christlike.
So that’s what those marriage whiners meant! …Right?
(I know every marriage is different. I know I’m still a newlywed. But I also passionately believe that marriage needs more positive reviews, because it is ordained of God and has the potential for the utmost of human joy. This is great for those struggling with communication.)
That adorable picture thanks to the lovely Brooke Schultz.
[EDIT: Just saw this and thought it was relevant: Saving Your Marriage]